If cremation has been chosen and quite possibly there will be those in the family who have never been involved in this kind of disposition of the body, it becomes even more imperative that we proceed with care and caution. The answer to this is to make general plans, have a family meeting so everyone has a voice in the plans and understands what is to happen, and then make it clear that it will be all right if changes have to be made.
Cremation is the method of choice for a growing number of families in the United States, It can be a meaningful form of caring for the body of a loved one. Cremation should be looked upon as simply an alternative to burial. This guide is not designed to talk you out of cremation, or sell you anything, or "upgrade" any choices you make. Our hope is that it will simply share the options with you with simplicity and clarity so you can make choices that will be good for your family.
Planning is an act of love. Some folks have tried to paint the funeral as plastic, costly, meaningless and even pagan. They seem to think the sophisticated thing to do is deny death and ignore the inner need to express love toward a loved one who has died.
Viewing gives reality and closure. If at all possible, we think it is important for the family to view the body of the loved one. This may seem like a terrible ordeal to put a grieving person through, but it is hard to find reality without this experience, but in most cases it has a healing and comforting effect on us.
Gatherings provide a chance to talk. Visitation times at the funeral home or friends dropping by the home give us the chance to begin telling the stories about our loved one. The stories we tell will one day become the great memories that stay in our hearts forever.
The funeral gives us permission to grieve. Grief is not an enemy. It is nature's way of healing a broken heart. We are doing the best job of handling grief when we are grieving. The more we express our grief the sooner we work through this process that leads to health. Nothing that we know of gives us a better chance and more freedom of expression than the funeral experience.
Utilizing cremation does not put any limits whatsoever on what can be done at the funeral. Examples would be:
